10. Don't speed through Nolanville
This has really changed over the past decade, but there was a time when Nolanville was one of the most feared speedtraps in the state. The entire city is a half mile stretch on the highway, so the cops just spent their days pulling people over for fun. It's not that bad anymore, but just don't do it. It's not worth taking the risk.

9. Please...just move over.
If you're driving in the fast lane...even if you are speeding...and someone is coming up behind you, just get out of the way. Otherwise, they will get so close to your bumper that you could reach out and slap them, which is of course what you'll want to do.

8. If you want to sing while you're driving...
that's ok by me. But if you are going to be obvious about it and look like a fool, I'm going to point and laugh as I drive by. I'm just warning you now.

7. Don't let anyone on the highway
If you are driving on the highway and you are approaching an entrance ramp, please DO NOT get over into the empty left lane to allow vehicles to get onto the highway without having to either come to a complete stop or drive down the shoulder. We wouldn't want that. Drive friendly, my ass.

6. Get off your phone...
or get an earbud-thingy. And if you're one of those people that constantly talks with your hands, just stay off the phone completely. There's no safe way for you to do it. Morons. I'm not saying you have to keepyour hands at 10 and 2, but keep some part of your body on the steering wheel at all times...'kay?

5. You don't actually need room to merge
Just because there isn't room for your car to merge into the other lane, that shouldn't stop you. Everyone will gladly get out of your way. Hey...you're in a hurry, right??

4. Feel free to use the shoulder
On mornings when traffic is back up out of Ft. Hood out to the highway, there are always a large number of jackasses that think we must be sitting there because we like it. They simply jump onto the shoulder and go up to the front. (This is why we shouldn't have concealed hand guns in Texas.)

3. Morning drive times depend on PT schedules
For all of you non-military types, PT would be physical trianing. If the units have PT, which they usually do in the mornings, they are normally going home to shower about the time most of us are going in to work...so the traffic is pretty smooth. However, if they don't have to go in to work out...forget about it. The entire post ends up trying to get through the gate at the same time, and it feels like sitting on LBJ during rush hour.

2. Fear the rain
Texans can't drive on ice or in the rain. That's pretty much a given. They drive REALLY slow, which actually ends up causing more problems than it prevents. If it rained in Texas like it does in Seattle, we'd never get anywhere. However, Ft. Hood is special...we mix in the non-water-driving Texans with people from around the country who just want them to GET THE HELL OFF THE ROAD. During heavy rain, the two lanes are vastly different. Right lane = 20mph, left lane = Indy 500. God help anyone that gets the system wrong.

1. Throw all the rules out the window.
In a town like Killeen, the population is constantly rotating in and out. The driving styles can't be pinned down long enough to make a real evalutation of them. Southern hospitality one day, New York cab drivers the next. It's a hoot...if you have a death wish, that is.

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